For centuries Christians have used the Bible as an excuse to beat their children. Of course before society solidified enough to give us laws protecting the innocent miniature humans known as children beating your kids was widely considered acceptable discipline. Even in today’s world certain forms of physical punishment are legal in certain parts of the Western civilized world. But there is a difference between a hand smacking a child’s hand away from a hot stove and getting a branch, a rod or another device that will actually leave a serious mark.
Child abuse is a horribly immoral thing so you’d think that the Bible, a book inspired by the infinitely wise and merciful creator of the Universe, would outright condemn the abuse of children. Except that it doesn’t, ever, at all. In fact the Bible is quite in favor of beating your children. Numerous verses claim that beating your child is not only morally okay but its actually beneficial to the child later in life.
Often lauded as the wisest book of the Bible Proverbs, credited to King Solomon himself (though of unknown authorship), tells us that children should be beaten.
Later on in the book we are told that children who disobey their parents should have their eyes plucked out by a raven. How wonderfully wise and merciful! Yes what a truly beautiful sentiment to put down on paper!
Sarcasm aside this is a rather frightening set of passages, although certainly not as severe in their wickedness as other passages I’ve talked about on this blog. It does seem odd that a God would inspire these passages. What, exactly, is God’s obsession with the Earthly authority parents have over their children that would cause him to inspire such cruel proverbial teachings?
Sometimes a beating is not enough. Sometimes it will be necessary to stone your child to death. Sometimes, when your child is rebellious enough, you may have to gather together everyone in town to hit them with rocks until they are bloodied, broken, and just plain fucking dead.
Aside from cursing your Father or Mother the Bible offers another instance in which a child should be put to death – if that child is rebellious, gluttonous and drunk they should be stoned to death.
Most people would probably try an intervention first, perhaps alcoholics anonymous or some other therapy group (somewhat ironically Alcoholics Anonymous is a religious institution that requires you to call on a higher power to break your addiction, rebellious children shouldn’t call on Yahweh). If your kid won’t listen to you after you’ve talked to him about his ways there is only one Biblical solution – take your kid and stone them to death, they are evil. In today’s society there is question as to whether capital punishment is a moral thing in the first place and there are Christians that would object to the death penalty. Yet the Bible is clear on a whole host of issues that are deserving of the death penalty.
So let’s look at another passage that reflects the Bible’s “Family Values”. What should Christians and Jews do when a member of their family turns to another religion. Let’s say your Niece becomes a neo-pagan for whatever reason or your Brother is a Wiccan or your dear Auntie Edna is a Hindu… what do you do when they begin talking about their religion and trying to get you to join them?
A) Politely decline and agree to disagree on the subject of religion
B) Get into a Heated Religious Debate
C) Stop talking to them and even ignore them at Thanksgiving Dinner
D) Gather everyone together and stone them to death, you and your family MUST be first to cast stones and participate in the brutal execution
So as you can see the correct answer is actually D. See following some other faith or worshiping some other God is a capital offense in the Bible, it is punishable by one thing and one thing only – DEATH. Just like Islamic scriptures calling for unbelievers to be smited (smote?) the Bible is clear that those who worship other gods are deserving of DEATH.
And of course in this case you have to stone your own family together? Ask yourself, Christians, would you be willing to hurl stones at a loved one because they worshiped another God and watch the life leave their eyes? Do you have the bile, hate and evil in your heart to follow the word of God?
I know, I know, I know what you’re saying. Jesus says he who is without sin should cast the first stone. Jesus came and he gave us a new way to live and that includes a new way to deal with our families right?
Please people take the time to actually read your Bibles.
Because its fucking atrocious, its filled with awful laws, evil “morals”, and depicts a stupid, cruel, self-contradictory God that is so stupid and evil it can only be man-made. Stay-tuned for my next post which will also be about the unsavory ways in which Biblical characters and stories completely demolish the notion that the Bible is the good book and its God anything other than an evil invention of sadistic primitive minds.